


I Will Never Stop Missing You

by karenae



Series: In Vino Veritas [1]
Category: Harvest Moon, Harvest Moon 64
Genre: Diary/Journal, F/M, death (mentioned) - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-12
Updated: 2016-06-01
Packaged: 2018-03-22 15:06:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3733381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/karenae/pseuds/karenae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karen's life told through small moments and her journal/diary. She writes about her past, about her experiences in the town and in the city, and about her relationships throughout the years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! This is my first fic ever, and I'm not sure how consistent the updates will be, but I've already got some headway and will be posting what I have over time. Un-beta'd and probably will stay that way.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this has Karen's first journal entry as well as a bit of a prologue I guess.

Karen sat down at her desk, twirling her pen idly between her fingers, her left hand stroking the edge of the blank page before her. A soft sigh passed through her lips, lamenting the time wasted staring at the journal below, procrastinating. Deciding whether or not to desecrate the untouched pages before her.

A single strand of blonde hair tickled her face. Her fingers delicately combed the hair back, and tucked it behind her ear. The gesture, practical and soothing, marked the emergence of her decision.

A gift gone unused is a gift gone unappreciated.

She put the pen to the page and began writing…

 

* * *

Entry I

I miss Eve.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Karen has always been my favorite character, ever since I played Harvest Moon 64 for the first time. With her fire and passion, her long two-toned hair, and her green eyes, I just instantly loved her. I started playing HM64 before I could even read so it's just a big part of me. I even own 12 games lol. This, like most all fanfics, is a labor of love about one of my favorite characters and one of my favorite franchises.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karen reminisces about Eve

Entry II

I've always admired my grandmother Eve. She was strong willed and, the rumor was, not easily wooed. She was charming, flirtatious. Free spirited.

I remember her gentle smile and her carefree attitude about life. I remember the look on her face when my parents were picking me up from a day with Eve, and I said I never wanted to leave her. 

I remember her visiting Grandpa Pete's grave. Bereft and sentimental she uttered, "You said you'd keep me company, that I'd never be alone again. You know how I get. Our son tries, but... I can't help feeling abandoned without you here."

 

* * *

Entry III

The townsfolk tell me she was a miracle worker when it came to wine. She started out as a waitress, but she made her own recipes and grew her own grapes and soon enough she became a business owner, selling her wine to the bar and then began shipping it across the country.

Her wine is her legacy. It’s my father’s turn to uphold her legacy, and one day, it’ll be mine. My greatest wish is to find the Door to Heaven again. That wine of hers is legendary. Ours...not so much. 

 

* * *

 Entry IV

My parents said that they waited to give me this journal until I would appreciate it. I guess they figured I would consider it boring or useless, but they don't understand how much I treasure gifts from Eve. Eve had wanted to give me this journal for my birthday the year she died. It was found amongst her things when they divvied up her belongings. She had left this note inside for me:

_Happy Birthday, my precious and headstrong force of nature! I know it might seem a bit soon for you to be writing in a journal, but I felt that it will be just what you need one day, so I got it anyway. I could wait to give it to you until you're older, but where's the fun in that? My cute cloud, I hope you grow up to be a better, more confident and stronger young woman than I was. Best wishes for your life, I love you. If anything, remember that you define yourself, no one else._

_—Eve_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most of this fic will be journal entries, but there's a few parts that won't be.
> 
> I haven't played many games with Eve, but she's Karen's grandmother and I just think Karen's dialogue in game shows that she had a positive perception of her, with Karen inheriting Eve's hair in her bangs and talking about Eve's legacy with the vineyard.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karen feels very connected to her grandmother.

Entry V

I miss Eve's warmth. Her embracing aura.

She smelled heavily of fermenting grapes, the scent of home. I remember her best when I'm in the presence of wine. The smell is bittersweet as I do my chores around the vineyard. Even the grapes themselves appear weakened by her loss. They've been bitter since they lost her nurturing.

* * *

Entry VI

She always seemed somewhat ethereal to me. Certainly she had a connection to spirits (alcoholic and otherwise). I think she must have known the Harvest Goddess (honestly I've never been able to conceptualize the goddess without thinking of Eve).

My father says I'm idolizing her, making her out to be more than she was. I think he tries too hard to pretend she was normal. He feels personally victimized by her so-called strangeness. I feel it's worth idolizing her if it means I remember her positively, ignorant I may be of her flaws. My mom stays silent on the issue as always. 

* * *

Entry VII

As a child, I never took the Firefly Festival seriously until I saw Eve remembering Grandpa Pete one year. I guess I hadn’t really had anyone to think of when the spirits of our ancestors supposedly visited us from beyond, inhabiting the lights of our firelight flowers until they float into the ocean’s horizon and out of sight. But when I saw someone I knew and loved crying with joy at the reunion...

The next summer after Eve passed, it was the first time I went to the Firefly Festival and someone I remember and cared for was gone.

I never took the Firefly Festival seriously until Eve was there.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This might be a little heavy handed, but I think Karen has very strong emotions, so I feel it fits her character.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karen wonders whether or not her uncle heard about Eve's passing. She discusses her family's feelings on Eve's death.

Entry VIII

I know how my parents feel about Eve’s passing. My mom is certainly more upset than my father. She knew how much Eve meant to me, and she respected Eve deeply. She may have even come to love her mother-in-law over the years (Eve would always chastise my father when he criticized or belittled my mom). My father on the other hand feels liberated and shackled all at once. Eve left him the vineyard in her will. He’s never had a passion for the grapes, just the money that comes from them. However, his rarely used sense of honor binds him to the vineyard, despite the fact that he would much rather do anything else. He had hoped someone else would take over the vineyard, but Eve had other plans it seems. His liberation comes from lack of supervision. He can do as he wishes with the vineyard’s direction as its sole owner.

The power and money have definitely gone to his head. He was already a braggart and a miser, but with his control of the vineyard and its cash flow, his ego and bank account have increased exponentially. He refuses to pay for quality fertilizer and materials for the vineyard. He only replaces things after they fall apart instead of maintaining them so they don’t fall apart in the first place.

I know that my father is sad about his mom dying, but he still hasn't laid to rest his unresolved issues with her.

What I don’t know is how my uncle and his family feel about it. I only got to meet my uncle once, and he seemed a much gentler soul than my father. It was strange to see how two people from the same upbringing and family could be so different. He was visiting the vineyard when I met him. He said he had wanted to visit Eve before he lost the chance (at the time I didn't get what he meant, I didn't think about how old she was, that she could die). He has a son about my age, but his son had stayed home to help his mom at the house. My uncle seemed to prefer my company over his brother and sister-in-law (seeing as I was the only one besides Eve to have a conversation with him). I was a talkative child, curious about my family.

My father avoids talking about my uncle, apparently there was some reason I had never met my uncle before. I later heard it had something about life choices and abandoned responsibilities. My father didn’t like that I spent time with my uncle. My mom was silent on the issue as usual, siding with my father despite whatever her real opinion was. My mom didn’t talk with him much either, her conversation hollow and full of platitudes. Luckily Eve overruled their unspoken rule against talking with my uncle, and I was free to do as I wished.

Eve, my uncle, and I hung out nearly everyday during his visit. I got to hear a lot about our family history from their stories. That’s when I first learned that Eve had been a waitress before she founded the vineyard. I also learned that my dad used to not be a grouchy stale biscuit all the time. After my uncle left, I’ve never been able to get back in touch with him or his family. He left no address to send letters, and he never visited again. Eve had mentioned that her eldest son had more of her free spirit than my father. She told me my uncle was a huntsman that lived somewhat secluded in the woods outside of her old town with his wife and son. In his young adulthood he decided that the vineyard was not his calling, and instead followed his heart and found peace in nature. It was tough for her to let him go, but she respected his decision. She loved both of her children dearly.

I just hope that he knows about Eve’s passing, I don’t know if anyone told him. He hadn’t been at the funeral. I just wish I knew more about why our family is how it is. Maybe then I would know why it was so dysfunctional.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not crazy about this chapter, but hey, it's something. 
> 
> So yeah, I took a pretty long hiatus from this fic. Inspiration eluded me and life got busy. I was on a 3 hr road trip recently and I wrote a conversation between Karen and Gray during the ride, and it inspired me to work on this again.


End file.
